Self-Helpless

Nice party, Now I’m Ready to Leave

boring-dinnerAll introverts have been there. You go to a party. After a short time, you’ve had enough socialization and agonizing small talk. You’re ready to leave, but your extrovert friend and ride for the evening is having the time of her life. Here are some lines guaranteed to get her out the door pronto.

  • Your friend’s grandfather wants to know if you’re up for a game of Spin the Bottle.
  • I bet your boss would be interested in my multi-level marketing plan.
  • I think I’ll check out the host’s medicine cabinet.
  • I know she’s a nun but I think she really wants me.
  • Here’s something you’ve never seen anybody do with a stuffed shrimp.
  • I’m going to punch the next person who asks what I do for a living.
  • Tonight’s the night I finally open up about my painful rectal itch.
  • I’ve narrowed the guests down to three potential sperm donors.
  • I think I’m going to lie down under that pile of coats.
  • This party could use some serious yodeling.
Standard

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s