Job Interview Questions and Topics You’ll Most Likely Never Encounter

  • Can you explain the 25-year gap in your employment?
  • Why are you looking for a new job, and why are you constantly looking over your shoulder?
  • Where do you see yourself in three years after you’ve been downsized?
  • Describe a time you demonstrated leadership skills that didn’t involve threats of deportation or violence.
  • What is your greatest strength that doesn’t involve bench-pressing a co-worker?
  • What is your greatest weakness that doesn’t involve stealing co-workers’ food from the cafeteria refrigerator?
  • Can you talk about a time you made a mistake – aside from parking today in our CEO’s reserved space?
  • How would your boss and colleagues in the witness protection program describe you?
  • How do you deal with the pressure of stressful situations aside from banging your head on my desk?
  • What makes you unique? And keep in mind you’re the third nude applicant we’ve interviewed today.

Ben Alper writes for late night talk show hosts, comedians and others. He is the author of “Thank You for Not Talking: A Laughable Look at Introverts.”

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s